A friend recently emailed me a link to a John Piper sermon.

"This really spoke to me. I hope it will speak to you, too."

It was about Asa, from 2 Chronicles 16. A passage I have likely glossed over multiple times during a reading plan... just waiting for the New Testament portion, the part that I can apply. Right?

It's called "Asa's Folly." He basically says Asa's folly was trying to accomplish things in his own strength rather than surrendering all of the human things he relied on and relying on the Lord who had always been faithful.

I started going to counseling. Have I said that yet? It's new.

Yesterday, my counselor asked me what change in my life looks like. I felt like my brain shouted one word over and over in capital letters.


God keeps urging me to simply let go. Believe He is in control... Believe His eyes are running to and fro throughout the whole earth, to give strong support to those whose heart is blameless toward Him (2 Chronicles 16:9).

A couple of days after receiving this sermon in my email, a friend said she had heard if we feel driven (urgency) to do something, it probably isn't of the Spirit. So much of my life is a sense of urgency, anxiety, despair. I feel I need to exercise daily (cardio and weights)... I have urgency to burn. those. calories. Urgent! Urgent! Teach my toddler memory verses. Urgent! Urgent! Clean my home, prepare a home cooked healthy meal from scratch. Urgent! Urgent!

To what end? I desperately long for someone to affirm me. Tell me I look like I have lost weight or that I am a good mom. I long for that validation of worth from perfect strangers. I so crave their approval. I long for the glorification of self.

What does the alternative look like? Abiding in Him... I want to believe that true freedom is in Christ. I want to believe that He does the work of making the fruit that lasts if I simply abide.

My study Bible says this: "Abide in me" is to continue in a daily, personal relationship with Jesus characterized by TRUST, prayer, obedience and JOY.

Nowhere does it say anxiety, despair, urgency.

It goes on to discuss the pruning process which "gives a picture of painful but necessary removal of some interests and activities in order that the remaining branches may bear even more fruit."

Um, painful? Yes. Necessary? Yes.

I hope this can help someone.


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